When are you having a baby?

That’s the question we have to get used to hearing. If the answer was simple, we would say September. No, not September 2012; September 2011... cause that’s how long we’ve been trying to get pregnant. Unfortunately, the answer isn’t that simple. *sigh*

I’ve always said my biggest fear was not being able to have children (whether biologically or through adoption) and over the last 9 months, my fears have slowly bubbled up. We’ve also run into a few roadblocks. So far, it’s nothing major, but it might be the reason why we haven’t been able to get pregnant so far. The first roadblock was discovered when my doctor sent me for a battery of tests. We discovered that my prolactin level is too high. Prolactin is a hormone which is normally produced when a woman is pregnant and when she is breastfeeding. It’s the hormone that reduces the chances of a woman getting pregnant while breastfeeding. However, we’ve all heard of woman who get pregnant even when breastfeeding so it’s not a complete loss just yet. The other challenge is my age. If I have to hear or read one more time how 35 is the deadly age when fertility starts to decline, I might just have to punch someone. However, that’s the reality of the situation. Every month that goes by, my capacity to have children is reduced. I feel like a ticking time bomb some days. Not all the news we’ve received has been bad, of course. Mr Perfect (being as perfect as he is), also has a perfect sperm count. Yay Mr. Perfect! Actually, I believe the doctor said “awesome swimmers” which Mr. Perfect has asked me to highlight anytime I talk about his junk. :-)

That being said, things are looking up these days! Yesterday I met with the gynaecologist (or vaginacologist as Mr Perfect likes to call her) and my appointment was awesome! First of all, she thinks the high prolactin might not be a concern after all and is sending me for follow-up tests. She also said that everything looks normal and that I’m definitely ovulating according to my charts. Another yay! Finally, she said she didn’t want to mess around with trying different things and wants us to get down to business ASAP. I was so happy she didn’t want to spend another year testing things out and wants to be proactive right away.

So here’s the plan. In a few weeks I will have an HSG test done to make sure I don’t have any blockages. If the test indicates everything is ok and we still aren’t pregnant, we will proceed to an intrauterine insemination or IUI, which involves way more people than I ever imagined would be present when I conceive a child. Although an IUI is generally used for cases that involve male infertility, the doctor wants to push for this since it optimises our chance of getting pregnant. Since time is a factor at my age, we are doing everything possible for a positive outcome. If all goes well, we could be welcoming a new baby as early as July of next year.

As a back-up measure we’ve looked into adoption and have put our names on the waiting list for a public adoption. Problem is, the waiting list is 8 to 9 years long! I’m not kidding. I asked the social worker if it ever happens that someone gets a child earlier than the 8 year wait and she said that in her 15 year career, one couple got a child at the 7.5 year mark. Nice. We’ve also looked into private adoption, but with prices starting at 10K for a domestic adoption, 15 to 20K for an international adoption and 25k for a US adoption, it’s a bit pricey at this point in the game. Here’s hoping everything works out and we don’t have to go that route.

In other news, we’ve decided to put the house sale on hold until the Spring. There are just too many stressful things going on right now. We’ve also discovered we need to redo the roof before selling. Add to that, the costs associated with the IUI (and quite possibly multiple IUIs) and we just aren’t in a position to double our mortgage right now. We’re still going ahead with all the renos, but we aren’t rushing to get it done in the next month. At least we’ll get to enjoy some of the renos we’ve done... right? That’s what I keep telling myself anyway.