So… now what?

My final marks have been trickling in and the news isn’t good. My expectations versus reality looked a little like this:

French hoping for a B+ got a C
Physics hoping for a B got a C
Physics lab hoping for a B+ or A got a B

I’m still waiting on others. Last night I checked to see if any new marks were posted and was floored by what I saw… Math: F. Yeah F, for FUUUUUUCK! This is my freaking second attempt at the class. I was actually getting it this time, but the prof’s exams are notoriously difficult. I only needed a 45% on the finale to pass so I never really expected to fail. I emailed the prof and he’ll be in his office this afternoon so I can go check out my final.

I guess this means goodbye to getting into the program. Well, at least for another year anyway. That means an extra year of sorry salaries… an extra year of stressing over money… an extra year of roommates. UGH.

Last night I woke up in the middle of the night realizing that it might still be possible to fix this. There’s a spring class for Calculus 1 starting May 5 and then Calculus 2 (which I was planning on taking) starts 2 days after the first one ends. It would mean another 12 weeks of school while working full-time. I’m trying to decide if this is really what I should do. I tired out as it is… will this make it even worse? I would end up with about a month (August) with only having to work full-time. I have one more week off before school/work would start and I’ll also get a week off in July because I’ll be switching departments at the hospital. Is that enough?

It also comes with a huge risk. I won’t know until at least June if I get into the program or not. I’ve heard of exceptions being made in special cases and I might be a special case given that I’m a mature student. It’ll cost me $1,000+ for the 2 classes this summer and if I do them and don’t get in, then what will I do?

This sucks.